Aunt-ophobia

I dread meeting aunts. My own, my friend's, even my neighbour's. Infact every lady I can call an aunt. Especially the aunts who've known me for a while. For they seem to be united in a singular, incessant urge to constantly size me up, dampen my spirits and throw me into a virtual wastebasket, every single time I meet them.

Its always about how I have become darker since the last time they saw me (the consistency and regularity with which this is thrown at me, a casual listener, who had had the misfortune of overhearing those words atleast half the time they were uttered, would think I resemble a darker shade of charcoal) OR how Ive become fatter (which is quiet disconcerting to hear, me being the ordinary girl-next-door who'd freak out at the mere thought of not being able to fit into my favorite jeans) OR about how Ive become thinner (no, not the attractive kind of thinness, the thinness that’s generally associated with malnutrition and undernourishment, if you get my drift).

The only way Id be emboldened to confront an Aunt is with the prior sound knowledge (from a trusted critic) that such opinion (which most often is one or more of the afore mentioned three), whatever the intent might be, are not true. Aunts are one species I steer clear of when I am feeling low.

Annoyingly its never about my job, my studies, my choice of friends, my hobbies, the books I read or any of the variety of other things which could be commented upon. Not that I fair better in those, but comments on those would've made sense. On second thoughts, no it wouldnt have made any sense, but atleast Id have a respite from the monotonous topics of my the skin tone and weight.

And no, Im not mature enough to discard those distasteful comments with a flick of my intellect or a rebel enough to label them old fashioned. (I admit doing the latter, though not with the requisite amount of gusto).

So what seems to be my only consolation is that I am, by no means, alone in this misery.

I distinctly remember the way a friend of mine, who was blissfully lost in the passing scenes outside the train window, franticly started searching for face wash, lotions and eye liner the second she received a message that her aunt would pick her up on her arrival at the station instead of her parents. Another friend of mine absolutely refuses to go to her aunt's unless she looks preped enough to attend a photo shoot. Expensive cloths, make up and all. Another would give up the shopping trip that was planned days ahead just because her shopping companion would be her aunt who wouldnt miss the chance to draw her attention to the pimple that managed to wriggle out over night. Can you imagine that? Canceling a shopping spree for the scare of what her aunt would do to her peace of mind? Such was her trepidation. I for one would think twice (or more) about visiting my aunt when Im wearing anything thats remotely western. Even if its raining cats and dogs, me stranded with no means of transportation whats so ever and miles away from any decent civilisation other than my aunt's which, to emphasise my discomfort/disinclination at having to visit her attired as I would be, would conveniently be a stone's throw away. Suicidal, really.

Theres one another incident which somehow refuses to slip from my memory. I cannot judge the relevance of such an incident to the present theme of my rambles but there does exist a common thread, yea, an aunt. It so happened that I and a couple of my friends decided to meet this friend's aunt, for what reason I cannot recollect. On reaching her home, we were told to await her, for she had gone on some errand. On her arrival, and after the initial widening of eyes and exchange of pleasantries, she pointedly stared at each of us, few seconds at a time, in a somewhat awkward silence. After what seemed a considerable amount of time, she announced, pointing her finger at one my friends (no, not her niece), that the accused was the prettiest of all. Well, you neednt be a woman-psychiatrist to know the effect of such a pronouncement on us, not to mention her niece (who, to her credit, did put in some effort at looking her best that day). Neither of us discussed the incident later, but Im pretty sure that each of us had something cheeky enough to say to the aunt the minute she passed her judgement. Each of us other than the 'prettiest-of-all' ofcourse.

Sunny side up

Sunny side up, originally uploaded by borealnz.

chocolate browns

chocolate browns, originally uploaded by _Neverletmego_.

*mute*

Who Cares..

So I was goin home for the festival.. Luggage set, locked up all the things I was leavin behind (havent yet achieved any level of trust with my land lady), checked if I had the ticket, that I was carryin enough money, food, water.. Felt relief, for I was on a vacaion, a short one, but a vacation nonetheless.. Come dinner time, the relief disappeared.. Odd, I know.. For at the dinner time, people all around me were opening packets, boxes, tupper ware.. Cooked food.. Not the restaurant stuff like mine.. It wasnt the content that mattered, what really did matter was the fact that there was someone back home, who cared enough to cook and pack them meals.. Alright, I could be a tad optimistic here (for my benefit) and point out that they all were leaving those people (who cared) behind and goin somewhere new, while I was goin home.. But the thought never came up during those agonising moments.. Amazing how small things make you miss home..

The World of Fleeting Friendships..

You know whats worse than letting go of a friend you've been with for a long time? To let go of a friend you couldve known better, if only she was around for longer. Kinda understand why people say the friends we make at college last for a long time. Must have something to do with the amount of time we spend with them im sure. Once out of college, every advance you want to make, be it professional or personal, jus seems to shove you around in every which direction. And when we do part, the last 'Do keep in touch' or 'Let me know your new number' seem so very absurd and insincere, its stifling to even think of saying such stuff.

The One the Only..

Well well well.. We have a guest amongst us today .. Mz Tassi..

ok here goess... well d names Tasneem.... dis female has no betta job to do... dan mess wid my name... n she dz it .. umm well... wateva!!! yea... so she messed wid the spelling of amongst ooopar too!! she rotte it as amoungstt... eeeks... yea.. so shez here... staring at the lil screen through taht biggggg spects dats coverin most of her face.. i tuk a silly snap in d morn today... here in MY CUBICLE!! thot i;d give the poor girl.. the "feel" of bein alotted ur OWN cubicle at wipro!! lolzz!!! neways./... shez regrettin my presence here already.. so i aint very sure if shez really gona keep all this stuff.... n safaaaaa is gona get us cofeee... umm yea... so shez still staring... ok now shez hitting me!!!!

heheheh now she gives her s\regular screechy kinda laugh.. dont go on my spells n stufff... ekkksss.. now she has her hands ariund( she corrected me here.. i was ritin oops typing "over")
my neckk ...

alright that should do..

she is soooooooooo mean!!!! that one line is ritten... oops.. typed by SUDHA!! the don the key!! i jus moved aside to take a phone call n there she pounced over the keyboard...
chal wil wrap it up here... shez still staringg....
n d cofee aint here yet either... :(
bye the byeess!!! nice riting in here too!! :P

finally!.. too shocked to write anythin here.. later ppl!

"Im gettin late for work..."

Wow, couldve hav never imagined the kind of stir that phrase, comin from me, would leave me in!! Not the first day at Wipro, not the bond agreement procedure, and definitely not the stipend; but this small phrase, uttered at the moment of dire desperation, did the trick. Thanks to the auto wala, who, despite bein urged to go as fast as he could, found enough time to hand signal an approachin speed bump or a stallin bus to warn the people at the rear. And also thanks to the guy who found the driver's gestures disturbing enough to pass a sneerin remark while passin us by. Needless to say, what ensued was a fierce self-righteous reaction from the driver and an equally fierce 'what the hell .. ' from the passerby. I was left out of the 'game', wonderin why i didnt hav enough sense to apply for the office transport. I jerked out of my thoughts soon enough to find the passer-by gettin off his bike to settle the score. And all I could think of was 'The Phrase' to forestall what evidently wouldve led to an hour long quarrel.

Yea im aware that most of my friends would flip over if they were to know that 'work' is the term i chose to define what we do these days, but hey, dont snatch away the simple pleasure of the white lie, not yet :).

The whole incident jus left me hoping. Hoping that I'd always be able to associate that phrase with that kind of warm sensation, nevermind the small cynical voice which jus said 'You wish!!'

Oh btw, im keepin up with my 'new net connection- new post on the blog' tradition. Though a week overdue!